


Toxic Relationships

by obanaisupremacy



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Akaashi has a girlfriend but its a bokuaka fic, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, College, Comfort/Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Minor Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, college students, controlling relationship, kinda angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:40:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24401467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/obanaisupremacy/pseuds/obanaisupremacy
Summary: Akaashi has never been in a relationship. He doesn't know what they are supposed to be like so how was he supposed to know he was in a abusive one. Well Bokuto is there to help Akaashi navigate his feelings about the situation.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Comments: 3
Kudos: 97





	1. The Relationship

**Author's Note:**

> TW this fic is centered around a abusive relationship so if you are very sensitive to that stuff probably not the best fic to read.  
> I got this idea from @bokuakachildren on twitter so you should go follow them

“Akaashiiii you have a girlfriend! Why didn’t you tell us!” Bokuto yelled as he ran over to Akaashi and Kuroo. 

“Bokuto man come on you can’t interrupt him as he was talking about her.” Kuroo said, nudging Bokuto in the shoulder. 

“Yes Bokuto-san, as I was explaining, her name is Cait. We have the same sports medicine class and she confessed to me about a week ago.” Akaashi said as he continued to pack up his supplies and zipped up his backpack. “Can we go eat lunch now?” 

“Well what happened after?” Bokuto asked as he followed Akaashi and Kuroo to the cafeteria like a lost puppy. 

“Well she is my girlfriend now so what do you think happened to Bokuto-san.” Akaashi said. 

“Oh come on Akaashi you know what I mean. Did you guys go on a date at all? How was it? Did you guys kiss? Akaashi give us details.” Bokuto said. At first he was hurt at the thought of Akaashi having a girlfriend but he pushed aside the thought. He just convinced himself that it hurt because Akaashi didn’t tell him first. 

“We went on a date and she was nice so I agreed to be in a relationship.” Akaashi said. 

“What? That's it?” Bokuto said. 

“I mean yeah what else do you need to get into a relationship?” Akaashi asked, confused. 

“Well I mean passion for one thing. I mean you guys like each other right?” Bokuto asked. 

“I think.” Akaashi said. 

“What doe-” Bokuto said but was cut off by Kuroo. 

“Akaashi didn’t you always say you were too busy for relationships?” Kuroo asked. 

“Well yes, I mean I am, but we are in college. I thought I might as well start giving relationships a shot.” Akaashi said. 

“Good for you man.” Kuroo said, patting him on the back. “Now we just need to get you a relationship.” Kuroo said, looking over to Bokuto. 

“Oh please I’m good. I am way too busy with volleyball. Plus if I wanted to get one I could.” Bokuto said. 

“Whatever you say man.” Kuroo said with a smirk. 

“Oh I have to go.” Akaashi said.

“Why?” Bokuto asked. 

“Cait wants to eat lunch with me.” Akaashi said.

“Well can we go and meet her?” Bokuto asked. 

“She just wants it to be us.” Akaashi said. “Bye guys.” He said and walked out the door. 

“That’s weird right?” Bokuto asked Kuroo as they both looked at the door Akaashi just left from. 

“What do you mean?” Kuroo asked. 

“I mean she wants to eat with only him. Why can’t we go too?” Bokuto asked with a pout. 

“They are a couple now. It makes sense. Kenma and I eat all the time alone too.” Kuroo said. 

“I know it just feels different.” Bokuto said, looking down. Something felt off to him. Sure he was beyond happy for Akaashi. I mean he finally got a girlfriend but Bokuto felt hurt? He didn’t know why. He just hoped it wouldn’t hurt their friendship. 

“Come on man lets go eat.” Kuroo said and they walked to the lunch lines. 

* * *

“Akaashi what do you mean you can’t come. This is the fifth time.” Bokuto wined over the phone. Bokuto and Akaashi had planned to go to a party today but Akaashi had cancelled on Bokuto again. 

“I am sorry Bokuto-san,” Akaashi said.

“Why can’t you come this time?” Bokuto asked. 

“Cait wanted to hang out today.” Akaashi said. 

“Can’t you just tell her you're busy?” Bokuto asked. 

“She said that going out and drinking might ruin my health.” Akaashi said. 

“I am sure going to a party time won’t ruin your health. Plus you don’t even have to drink.” Bokuto said. He was already dressed for the party and he didn’t want to have to be a third wheel to Kenma and Kuroo. “Please Akaashi I don’t want to go alone.” 

“I’m sorry, I will definitely come next time.”Akaashi said. 

“Well the next party is my birthday party so you better come.” Bokuto said as he finished tying his shoes. “You can bring Cait so I could meet her finally.” 

“I promise, I wouldn’t miss your birthday.” Akaashi said. Bokuto smilied. 

“I know you won’t, well then I guess I will talk to you later. Gotta go third wheel with Kenma and Kuroo.” Bokuto said. 

“Bye Bokuto-san.” Akaashi said. 

“Bye.” Bokuto said and ended the call. He grabbed his keys and wallet, then looked in the mirror. He was just wearing jeans and a t-shirt, nothing too fancy. He felt his heart ache a little when he remembered he wouldn’t be seeing Akaashi today. Lately they began to see each other less and less. Everytime Bokuto would try to meet up with Akaashi, Cait would have something to say about it. He never even met Cait and yet he felt like she had something against him. He also barely knew anything about her. Akaashi never talked about her during class and whenever Bokuto would bring her up Akaashi would never really be interested in talking about her. As far as Bokuto knew, she didn’t even exist and Akaashi could just be lying but he knows Akaashi would never do that. Bokuto just wanted to meet her already.

Bokuto didn’t really like her though. For the last five times that Bokuto had asked to hang out with Akaashi, Akaashi had declined because of something Cait had said. Bokuto didn’t understand it. He and Akaashi had been friends since high school, how could this girl come and just take away all of Akaashi’s attention. Bokuto tried not to think about it though. He would get mad and hurt and he never really understood why. The only thing he could think of was that he was jealous.

Of what exactly? Bokuto didn’t really know. I mean he knew he missed having Akaashi attention. It definitely hurt not hanging out with Akaashi. Like someone had taken part of his soul and left a big hole. Sure it was dramatic but Bokuto was dramatic. He just really missed hanging out with Akaashi all the time. He missed his simile and his laugh when Bokuto would do somthing dumb. He missed the way during lunch that sometimes Akaashi would eat off of Bokuto’s tray because for some reason it just looked more appealing to Akaashi. Bokuto knew he should be happy for him, I mean he finally got a girlfriend but he still felt sad. 

He pushed away the thoughts when he got a text from Kuroo saying they were here. Going to a party as a third wheel might be boring but he definitely didn’t want to stay home and sulk in his thoughts. 

* * *

  
  


It had now been two weeks since that party. Akaashi still hadn’t hung out with Bokuto but Bokuto's birthday was on Tuesday so he knew he would be able to actually talk to Akaashi then. Sure he saw him in class but Akaashi didn’t like to talk in class in case he missed any information. Speaking of class, it had just ended. Bokuto turned to Akaashi. 

“Hey Akaashi before you go can I talk to you?” Bokuto asked. He was scared to talk to him. They were best friends but they hadn’t talked in so long.

“Sure what is it Bokuto-san?” Akaashi asked. And, oh Bokuto’s heart seemed to skip a beat when Akaashi said his name, that was different. 

“Uh I just wanted to make sure you were coming to my birthday party, it will just be at my apartment around 7 so yeah.” Bokuto said. 

“Of course, me and Cait can come by early if you want so I can help you clean since I know you probably haven’t yet even though it’s tomorrow.” Akaashi said with a smirk. Bokuto felt his ears grow hot. 

“Thank you I totally forgot, you would think I would remember to clean considering I live there.” Bokuto laughed a little. 

“It’s all good Bokuto-san, we will be there around 5:30.” Akaashi said. “Have a good day.” Akaashi walked away as he waved. 

So something else that made Bokuto feel different was Akaashi saying we, and not referring to Bokuto. It felt off, Bokuto really needed to figure out his problem before they came over though. 

* * *

  
  


“Akaashi hi!” Bokuto said after he opened the door and gave Akaashi a hug.It was around 5:30 and Bokuto still hadn’t even started cleaning. Bokuto stepped back. Akaashi had a slight smile. 

“Bokuto-san this is Cait my girlfriend.” Akaashi said as he gestured to the girl next to him. She was about a couple inches shorter than Akaashi. She had black hair that was wavy and stopped at her shoulders. She had green eyes and was wearing a short black dress.

“Oh! Hey I haven’t even introduced myself, I am Bokuto.” Bokuto said as he went in to hug Cait. She quickly flinched back and Bokuto stopped a little before actually touching her. He normally hugged every new person he meant she just leaned back when he saw she was clearly uncomfortable with a hug. He scratched the back of his neck nervously, “Uh welcome.” He stepped aside and Cait and Akaashi walked in. 

“Bokuto-san have you cleaned at all?” Akaashi asked as Akaashi and Cait took off their shoes. 

“Uh no I have not, I knew you guys were coming over, I just forgot why you were coming early. Then I realized this place is a mess and it clicked.” Bokuto said. Akaashi laughed as Cait just looked unimpressed. 

“Don’t worry about it Bokuto-san.” Akaashi said and took off his jacket. “Cait and you can talk while I clean.” He said. 

“It’s really fine Akaashi I can do it.” Bokuto said. He could feel Cait’s judgement. Normally he would try to help Akaashi clean but it would just end up with Bokuto sitting on the couch while Akaashi cleaned. Akaashi had a certain way of cleaning and he didn’t like others trying to help because it would disrupt the way he was organizing. He was very particular about it. But Cait didn’t know that, she probably thought that Bokuto was just being nice so Akaashi would clean for him. He really wasn’t, he hated when Akaashi cleaned for him because he knew it seemed like Bokuto was using him, when in reality Akaashi always felt better after he cleaned for people. It was just a thing he liked to do.

Bokuto and Cait both sat on the couch while Akaashi made his way to start cleaning in the kitchen. 

“So do you always make him clean for you?”Cait asked. 

“Uh excuse me?” Bokuto asked, taken by surprise from the judgment in Cait's voice. 

“I mean why is your friend cleaning for you.” She asked while she looked at her nails making sure they weren’t chipped. 

“Uh he uh likes to clean. I have always tried to help him whenever he cleans but he hates when others help. It disrupts his way of cleaning. Plus he feels better when he cleans. It calms him down.” Bokuto said confused on how to respond. 

“I know he likes to clean, he is my boyfriend.” She said glaring at Bokuto. 

“Ah okay sorry?” Bokuto said. He was so confused. Sure it might look weird Akaashi cleaning for him but that didn’t mean she should have this much attitude. 

“What even is your relationship with Akaashi.” She asked. 

“Oh uh he's my best friend, we have known each other since high school. Did he not tell you about me?” Bokuto asked. 

“Oh he did, you're almost the only thing he talks about, that and volleyball. I told him to stop talking about volleyball so now he only talks about you or he doesn’t talk at all.” She said. 

“You told him to stop talking about volleyball?” Bokuto asked. That didn’t make any sense, Akaashi loved volleyball. He was going into sports medicine so he could help volleyball athletes. Bokuto didn’t understand why she would have a problem with it. Partners are supposed to support each other’s interests right? 

“Yes, it was annoying so I told him to stop. I also told him to stop talking about you but then he just stopped talking completely. So now I allow him to talk about you but it is getting really annoying. It seems like his only care in the world is you.” She said. At first that statement made Bokuto happy. He thought wow Akaashi really talks about me that much. He really cares that much for me. Then he realized how messed up the rest of the statement was. 

“Wait hold on, you don’t allow him to talk about things he likes? What are you, his teacher?” Bokuto said. He was getting quite annoyed with this conversation. I mean what kind of girlfriend makes their boyfriend not talk about things. Something was wrong here. This wasn’t right. She glared at him again. 

“No, I just find some things annoying.” She said. 

“Alright done with the kitchen.” Akaashi said, walking out of the kitchen with a smile. Bokuto and Cait both looked up at him. 

“Oh uh thanks man.” Bokuto said. Akaashi quirked his brow. Of course he could already tell something was wrong with Bokuto. 

“Is something wrong?” Akaashi asked. 

“No no everything is good we were just talking.” Bokuto said. He looked over to Cait and she was suddenly smiling like the sweetest girl on the planet. What was going on Bokuto wondered. 

“Well then I am going to clean this room. Is that ok Bokuto-san?” Akaashi asked. Bokuto still for some reason kept getting butterflies whenever Akaashi would call him that recently. 

“Yup” He said and Akaashi started to clean the room. The rest of the time Bokuto and Cait sat in silence as Akaashi cleaned with soft jazz music playing in the background. 

All Bokuto could think was something was not right. 

  
  


* * *

“Bokuto-san it's 6:45 you might want to change for the party.” Akaashi said as he sat down next to Cait. He had just finished cleaning. 

“Oh yeah I’ll be right back.” Bokuto said and walked into his room, closing the door behind him. 

He slipped on his jeans and muscle t shirt. That was about the fanciest Bokuto got. He was about to open his door when he heard Cait’s voice. For some reason he decided to stop before opening the door. 

“Akaashi can you please put that jacket back on, that shirt leaves nothing to the imagination.” Cait said. Bokuto didn’t really understand what she meant. Sure Akaashi's shirt is a little tight and sure for some reason Bokuto felt his heartbeat quicken when Akaashi would stretch because you could see his muscle move under his shirt, but why should he cover himself just for her. And why would she be controlling what Akaashi did with his clothes. 

“But it is hot in here Cait. Who cares, if someone is looking at me it doesn’t matter, I am your boyfriend not anyone else's.” Akaashi said. He sounded annoyed which Akaashi rarely gets annoyed so it was surprising to Bokuto. 

“Akaashi I am not going to ask again. Put your jacket on.” Cait said, her voice sounding louder. 

“Cait, I don’t want to.” Akaashi said. 

“Do you want to go through what happened last time you didn’t listen to me?” Cait asked. 

What? What the hell was she talking about. Why was she threatening Akaashi like that. What happened last time. Why was she forcing him to do something he didn’t want to do. What exactly happened last time. 

Too many thoughts were going around Bokuto’s head so he quickly opened his door and stepped into the living room. Akaashi was in the middle of putting his jacket back on. 

“Oh Akaashi you are putting your jacket back on, it is pretty hot though?” Bokuto asked. 

“Oh yeah uh I was getting cold so.” Akaashi said. 

“Well uh I liked your shirt a little sad that it is getting covered now.” Bokuto said with a pout. He didn’t know why he was saying this but he wanted Akaashi to know that he didn’t need to wear his jacket. 

“I am sure you like more than his shirt.” Cait mumbled but both Akaashi and Bokuto heard. Akaashis ears grew pink. Huh? That’s new. 

“Uh well the first-” Bokuto was saying but was quickly off by the door bell. He walked over to the door and opened it. There stood Kenma and Kuroo. 

“Oh hey guys welcome.” He said and opened the door and let them in. 

“Happy birthday man.” Kuroo said and handed Bokuto a present. 

“It’s from both of us.” Kenma said. Bokuto's smile grew. 

“Thank you guys.” Bokuto said. Kuroo both walked over to Akaashi and Cait and introduced themselves as more guests came. 

* * *

  
  


It was now later in the night and Bokuto was sitting on his couch talking with Hinata. 

“It was the best spike I ever-” Hinata was saying but was cut off by Akaashi tapping Bokuto on the shoulder. 

“Hey uh Bokuto can I talk to you for a second?” Akaashi asked. 

“Yeah!” Bokuto said. “We can go talk in my room, I’ll be right back Shoyo” Bokuto said and Akaahsi and him walked into his room. Akashi was carrying a little box. Bokuto shut the door behind them. 

“What’s up Akaashi?” Bokuto asked. His nerves were rising, he hadn’t been in a room alone with Akaashi since he got a girlfriend. Bokuto didn’t know why he was so nervous. He did know that the yellow glow from his ceiling fan gave Akaashi’s skin a nice glow. It made his skin look softer than normal. Soft enough to touch. His eyes also looked softer. And his lips. His lips looked a lot softer then normal. Wait lips? Why was Bokuto looking at Akaashi’s lips? 

“Uh I wanted to give you your present.” Akaashi said, holding out the nicely wrapped box. 

“Oh.” Bokuto breathed out. He took the box from Akaashi’s hands. His fingers brushing Akaashi’s as a bolt of electricity shot through his fingers. He ripping open the wrapping and opened the box. 

"It's cologne." Bokuto said as he looked at the glass bottle. 

“Uh yes it is, it is the one I wear. You always say I smell so good and I saw you are running out of cologne so I got you some.” Akaashi said. Bokuto looked up from the box to look Akaashi in the eyes. 

“It will be like you are with me all the time.” Bokuto said and felt his face heat up. He didn’t mean to say it like that but it was all he could think about. 

“Yeah I guess.” Akaashi said. His face was growing redder but Bokuto ignored that fact. He walked over to Akaashi and hugged him, burying his head in his shoulder. 

“Thank you.” He said. Akaashi relaxed after a little and hugged him back even tighter. 

“Of course Bokuto-san.” Akaashi whispered. Bokuto leaned back out of the hug and looked at Akaashi. 

“How did you even know I was almost out of cologne, I didn’t even know myself.” He said in a whisper because they were still close to hear a whisper. 

“A couple weeks ago in class you were saying how you are almost out but don’t know which one to get. I knew you wouldn’t be able to make up your mind and would end up just forgetting.” Akaashi said. 

“You were listening?” Bokuto asked. It seems as though their faces were getting closer. The room was sort of disappearing. All Bokuto could focus on was Akaashi and the way his eyes scrunched up when he smiled. He could feel Akaashi’s breath on his lips. The whole room felt like it was thrown into a fire when Bokuto’s eyes flicked down to Akaashi’s lips. It was like a magnet was pulling his whole body towards Akaashi and wouldn’t be satisfied until they kissed.

“I always listen to you Bokuto-san,” Akaashi said, voice lower than a whisper, as if he didn’t want to break the trace they were in. It was so tempting, Bokuto didn’t realize how badly he wanted to kiss Akaashi until now. He was about to lean fully in and say fuck it to the world when the bedroom door flew open. 

“Akashi, can we go.” Cait said in her monotone voice. Akaashi and Bokuto jumped back from each other. Bokuto was frozen, he didn’t know what just happened. 

“Uh yeah we can, I’ll see you tomorrow in class Bokuto-san.” Akaash said. He quickly walked out as Cait eyed Bokuto suspiciously and then followed Akaashi out. Bokuto stayed there standing silently, and looked suddenly at the forgotten cologne. He wanted to kiss Akaashi, he still wanted to but at that moment the urge was so strong. Why? Why did Bokuto feel this way. He shouldn’t be kissing Akaashi, Akaashi’s girlfriend should be. At that though Bokuto cringed. No Cait should definitely not be kissing Akaashi. Akaashi was way too good for her. He didn’t deserve to be controlled by her like this. 

Well then who does he deserve? His mind wondered. 

Definitely not himself, he would never be good enough for Akaashi. But god he would work for the rest of his life to become good enough for Akaashi. And then he realized. 

“Oh” Bokuto said out loud to himself. “I like Akaashi.” As he said it out loud he then felt very sick. 

God he liked his best friend. His best friend that had a girlfriend! He could never tell him, would never tell him. It would absolutely ruin their friendship if Akaashi didn’t return his feelings.  
What if he likes you back? Bokuto’s mind wondered more. No he definitely didn’t, there was no way. Why would he say yes to Cait if he liked Bokuto. There was just no way. But Bokuto definitely liked Akaashi. His mind repeated it over and over _I like Akaashi I like Akaashi I Like Akaashi_

Well this isn’t good, he thought.

* * *

The party was pretty much over by the time Akaashi left, the only ones still at Bokuto’s apartment were Kuroo and Kenma. 

“Kenma, hey man can I ask you a question?” Bokuto said as they sat down on the couch.

“Sure what is it Bokuto?” Kenma asked. Kuroo quirked his brow since Bokuto rarely asked Kenma anything but he didn’t say anything. 

“Why did you decide to tell Kuroo you like him?” He asked. He had never heard Kenma’s side to the story on how they got together. All he knew was one day during freshman year in college Kuroo came to him jumping up and down because Kenma confessed and then they started going out. 

“Oh” Kenma said and a smilie appeared on his lips. “Uh well Kuroo and me were on the phone and he was talking about some party you guys were going to. He was talking about all the girls that would be there. At the time I had liked Kuroo for about a year and I was used to him talking about girl but that day had been a rough day. I don’t exactly remember what happened but I was feeling really bad that day. When Kuroo started talking about those girls I just broke apart. I felt like of course he would never love me when he has all these girls here.”

Kuroo squeezed Kenma’s hand, it was a hard subject for Kenma to talk about. Kenma smiled over at Kuroo and continued talking

“so I was on the phone with him and he continued to talk and I just started crying. At first I tired to cry silently so Kuroo wouldn’t worry and soon hang up but then he heard me. And he knew what I sounded like when I cried so he asked what was wrong and I didn’t reply and he just kept asking and eventually I just said I gotta go and hung up. I don’t really know why but Kuroo and couple hours later showed up on my front door.” 

Bokuto remembers that day, Kuroo and him were supposed to go to a party but then Kuroo called saying that he had to go back home for an emergency. 

“And when I opened the door and saw him, I broke down again and just ran to him and asked him to just hold me. After a little while we were still hugging and my crying had went down. I just said ‘I love you’ and he went completely went rigid and I felt like it was over. He was gonna reject me but still stay we were the best of friends because that’s just how Kuroo is. Then he pulled me back so he could look at my face and said I love you too. At then the rest is pretty much history.” Kenma said. 

“Kenma overthought the whole situation and never realized how head over heels in love I was for him.” Kuroo said laughing slightly. Kenma nudged him in the arm but was also slightly laughing. 

“No I understand.” Bokuto said looking down at his lap. “When you have a friendship that strong you never want to lose them or do anything to lose them. Even if it means your hurt.” 

Bokuto didn’t really know what to do. He wanted to hear Kenma’s story to hear what he did but it sounds like it was just too much for him to handle and he eventually just told Kuroo. Bokuto still didn’t know if he should tell Akaashi. Hell he just figured out his feelings, he couldn’t tell Akaashi yet. 

“Oh Bokuto did you realize your feelings for Akaashi?” Kenma asked. Bokuto quickly looked up, eye wide. 

“You know?” Bokuto asked. 

“Man we all know, expect well you and Akaashi.” Kuroo said. 

“He’ll hate me if he finds out.” Bokuto said. 

“You don’t know that for sure. You don’t know what others are thinking.” Kenma said. 

“I know but god he has a girlfriend. I can’t say anything, not yet at least.” Bokuto said. Kenma nodded sadly. 

“I hope it works out between you two though.” Kenma said. Bokuto smilied. 

“Thank you.” Bokuto said. 

“Well we better go, we both have early classes tomorrow.” Kuroo said. They all stood up and Bokuto walked them to the door. 

“Hope you had a great birthday man.” Kuroo said waving at Bokuto. 

“Thanks.” Bokuto said and waved them goodbye. 

* * *

  
  


It had been about three weeks since Bokuto’s birthday party and the only time Bokuto has seen Akaashi was in class. Luckily today Akaashi agreed to go to lunch with Bokuto and Kuroo as long as Cait came. So here they were the four of them all sitting at the table in silence. Kuroo had tired making conversation but Bokuto wasn’t really interested. He was more concerned with the bruises around Akaashi’s wrist. He had tired to bring it up but Akaashi just said that someone at his work had grabbed him and that was that. First off Bokuto wanted to kill whoever thought it was ok to grab Akaashi hard enough to bruise. Secondly he didn’t believe it. Akaashi hadn’t meet his eyes once when he was tellin the story which meant he was lying. 

“I am going to go to the restroom.” Cait said and stood up walking away. 

“So did you guys hear what happened with Lev?” Kuroo asked and both Bokuto and Akaashi looked over to him shaking their heads no. 

“Apparently he was in a abusive relationship. His girlfriend like hit him a shit, real messed up stuff. Luckily he got out of relationship though.” Kuroo said. 

“Is that not normal?” Akaashi asked. Bokuto’s head snapped to look over at Akaashi. Wait a second. Did Akaashi think girlfriends hitting their boyfriends was normal? Wait did this has anything to do with the bruises. It would make sense. Cait’s controlling behavior. Once Bokuto thought about it his eyes widen. 

“Kaashi what do you mean. Cait isn’t hitting you is she?” Bokuto asked. Both Kuroo and Bokuto waited silently as Akaashi looked down at his wrist. 

“Um no not really, I mean she slapped me a couple of times. But I can handle it I am strong. Just slapping isn’t a big deal. And she didn’t mean to bruise my wrist when she grabbed me, she really didn’t.” Akaashi said rubbing his wrist. Bokutoo’s stomach dropped. He quickly looked over at Kuroo who also had an expression of pain. 

“Akaashi, did Cait bruise your wrist.” Kuroo asked quietly. Akaashi looked up eyes widen as if he just realized what he said. 

“No, no she didn’t. I shouldn’t bruise just from a grab. I am not that weak. I am a guy I can handle it. She loves me she wouldn’t mean to hurt me.” Akaashi asked. Bokuto could feel his hands balling into a fist. This wasn’t ok. Bokuto knew something was off. Dammit why didn’t he think of this sooner. Why didn’t he think of this before Akaashi actually got hurt. 

“Akaashi, she has absolutely no right to slap you. No matter your gender or what you did.” Bokuto said softly. 

“But I- Cait said that people in relationships sometimes do that.” Akaashi said. 

“No that is not what happens in relationships. Akaashi this isn’t right. She wouldn’t hurt you if she really loved you.” Bokuto said. 

“Oh.” Akaashi said quietly. At the time Cait had began walking back. It took all Bokuto’s will power not to just beat her. How could she do this. How could Bokuto not have noticed sooner.

“Uh Cait.” Akaashi said as she sat down. “Is it normal for people in relationships to hit their partners?” Akaashi asked. You could hear the confusion in his voice. He didn’t understand. Cait looked towards Kuroo and Bokuto eyes widen. 

“Um.” She said nervously. 

“I think you and Akaashi are over Cait.” Bokuto said with a clear anger in his voice. 

“You don’t get to decide that, Akaashi babe tell them.” Cait said. Kuroo and Bokuto both got up. 

“Akaashi come on.” Bokuto said. 

“Cait Bokuto-san is right. I don’t think this relationship will work.” Akaashi said as Cait gasped. 

“What you can't be serious, after all the effort I put into to this relationship?" Cait said her voice growing louder. 

"You hurt me Cait." Akaashi said quietly. 

"Oh like I was supposed to know that. It's your fault, you never had a reaction how was I supposed to know!" Cait said. 

"Don't you dare blame him." Bokuto said. He was holding back as much as he could but he wasn't going to stand there and let Cait blame Akaashi. 

"Bokuto-san it's ok. Cait we are over." Akaashi said quickly then got up and walked out of the store.


	2. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just everything that happens after the break up.

It was now later that night. Kuroo had gone home because he had a really early class the next day. It was just Bokuto and Akaashi at Bokuto’s apartment. Bokuto brought the tea he was making over to Akaashi on the couch and sat down. 

“So how do you feel?” Bokuto asked as Akaashi took a sip of the tea. 

“Better now with tea.” Akaashi said. 

It was all so hard for Bokuto. Akaashi had went through a horrible experience and he didn’t even realize. It was fair. Akaashi didn’t deserve any of that. No one did. 

“I don’t really know what to think Bokuto-san.” Akaashi said as he looked up at Bokuto. 

“Do you want to talk about what she did.” Bokuto asked. He didn’t want Akaashi to talk about it if he didn’t feel comfortable but he also wanted to know what happened. 

“The first time she slapped me was after your birthday party. She was really upset. When we got back to my apartment she was yelling and throwing stuff. She broke one of my lamps and then she just slapped me. She looked shocked for a second. I didn’t really know what to do so I asked her ‘Do people in relationships normally do that.’ and she was confused.” Akaashi said. 

It was so frustrating to Bokuto. He knew Akaashi had never been in a relationship. He knew that Akaashi never read or watched shows with an actual romantic relationship. Akaashi didn’t like romance stuff. He found it boring so he just never looked at relationships before. Bokuto should have known to tell him what to expect. If Bokuto had just explained to Akashi warnings of a bad relationship then maybe this whole thing wouldn’t have happened. 

“She then asked me what I meant. So I explained to her that I have never been in a relationship and I had no clue what people were supposed to do. Her body kind of relaxed and she said that it was something that happened in relationships. After that I was even more confused. My cheeks burned from the slap and it hurt but apparently that was what people were supposed to do. I thought that maybe that’s what people meant when they said love hurts.” Akaashi said. Bokuto gently grabbed Akaashi’s hand to make Akashi look up at him. Akaashi’s eyes were glossy from tears. Bokuto hadn’t even realized he was crying. 

“That is never supposed to happen. When people say that love hurts they don’t mean physically. It hurts emotionally. Someone who loves you would never physically hurt you. Or emotional malitupiutate you. When she told you to stop talking about volleyball or to wear your jacket even thought you didn’t want to. Those were controlling behaviors. Partners shouldn’t be controlling.” Bokuto said. Akaashi’s eyes widen at the realization that Bokuto knew about those things. 

“I am so sorry this happened to you Akaashi, you didn’t deserve any of it. Even if you made her mad, you didn’t deserve the treatment.” Bokuto said and pulled Akaashi into a hugged. 

“I am so confused Bokuto-san.” Akaashi said in a whisper as they hugged. Bokuto rubbed circles on Akaashi back with his hand. 

“It’s okay Akaashi, I will be here for you the whole time. You will get through it.” Bokuto whispered. 

* * *

  
  


“Akaashi you sure you want to do this.” Bokuto asked. They were in his car parked right in front of a modern looking building. Akaashi had scheduled a meeting with a therapist. He told Bokuto that he went to therapist when he was younger and he felt like it would help to go back to one now. Akaashi had said he wanted to talk to someone about everything that happened and wanted to et help understanding and processes his feeling. While Bokuto obviously told him he could always talk to him, Bokuto knew it would be better to get professional help if Akaashi really wanted it. 

“Yes it will be fine, this is what I want don’t worry.” Akaash said. He got out of the car but before closing the door,

“Thank you truely, It had been good having you as my best friend during all this.” Akaashi said with a slight smile. Bokuto smiled back. 

“Of course Akaashi I will always be here for you, text me when your done ok.” Bokuto said. Akaasi nodded and closed the door. 

Bokuto felt heavy. He knew it was no time to confess to Akaashi. He had just gotten out of a really bad relationship and was in no where close to being ready to get into another relationship, but Bokuto till hurt. During all of this Bokuto had come to terms with his feelings for Akaashi. He definitely loved him. He just couldn’t tell him know. Bokuto felt selfish. It hurt hearing Akaashi call him friend. He wanted to be so much more then friends but he knew it wasn’t the right time. Bokuto sighed and then realized he was still in the parking lot. He turned his car on and backed out of the parking spot. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


It had been a couple weeks since Akaashi’s first therapist appointment. He and Bokuto had been hanging out a lot more like they used to. Akaashi was slowly getting used to everything that happened and slowly was learning how to cope. Akaashi’ therapist had suggested spending more time with friends that way he wasn’t alone with his thoughts all the time. So that’s what Akaashi started doing and Bokuto couldn’t be happier.

He was finally spending time with Akaashi again, and yet it still hurt. It hurt everytime Bokuto would hear his laugh because he wanted to hear it over and over. It hurt whenever he would catch himself staring at Akaashi longer then normal friends should. He couldn’t help himself. Akashi was beautiful. Especially today. 

They were both sitting on Bokuto’s couch and watching a movie. It was way past 12 so he knew Akaahsi would be spending the night and he honestly didn’t even know what movie they were watching. A few minutes before Akaashi had fallen asleep and now his head was resting on Bokuto’s shoulder. Bokuto’s placed him arm around Akaashi’s shoulder and rest his head on top of Akaashi’s head. He really couldn’t help himself. Akaashi was just so warm and soft. He would take any chance he could get to cuddle with Akaashi. It wasn’t weird for them though. There had been many times where they had fallen asleep cuddling, and sometimes Akaashi even asked to cuddle because it made it easier to sleep for him apparently. 

Slowly Bokuto’s eyes became heavier and he was drifted off into sleep. 

Bokuto woke at the smell of bacon. He slowly opened his eyes and trying to remember what happened last night. 

“Akaashi?” He said. He was confused because he could have swore that Akaashi was here last night but now he wasn’t. And why did it smell like bacon. 

“I am in the kitchen Bokuto-san.” Akaashi had said. 

Oh, Akaashi was cooking breakfast. He was cooking breakfast for them at Bokuto’s apartment. Bokuto could get used to this. 

He slowly sat up and walked into the kitchen to see Akaashi in his pjs that he leaves at Bokuto’s apartment and an apron. Bokuto chest ached. He wanted so badly to just reach out and hold Akaashi in his arms. He wanted to just kiss him until they both lost breath. 

Akaashi had turned around now and was saying something, but Bokuto didn’t hear him. 

“Bokuto-san?” Akaashi asked wondering if Bokuto was ok.    
“Sorry, sorry I was just zoning out.” Bokuto said and sat down at his kitchen island. “What you makin?” He asked. 

“Oh I was just making eggs and bacon.” Akaashi said as he turned back around to the stove and flipped the bacon. 

Bokuto could definitely get used to this. 

“Sounds great, how you feeling?” Bokuto asked. 

“I am doing good.” Akaashi said as he plated the food and brought it over to the island. He sat down next to Bokuto as Bokuto took a bite of the eggs. 

“It’s wonderful kaashi.” Bokuto said and quickly continued to eat. Akaashi’s cheeks burned but Bokuto didn’t realize. 

“I wanted to thank you Bokuto-san. I also wanted to tell you that it wasn’t you fault.” Akaashi said. Bokuto stopped eating. 

Oh he thought, he looked over at Akaashi. How did Akaashi know Bokuto was blaming himself. Bokuto must have shown his confusion on his face because Akaashi continued to explain. 

“I know you Bokuto, I know you want to always protect your friend and the people you care about. I know you put it on yourself when your loved one gets hurt. But this wasn’t you fault. I learned in therapy that it isn’t my fault either. It was Caits, and no one else. So please don’t blame yourself. I don't want to see you hurt too.” Akaashi said. Bokuto smiled. 

“Huh look at that, you are the one I should be helping yet you are helping me.” Bokuto said. Of course Akaashi noticed that Bokuto balmed himself. He noticed everything about Bokuto. Akaashi smiled. 

“I am getting a lot better bokuto-san, I think soon enough I will beable to start dating again.” Akashi said. Bokuto deflated. 

Of course Bokuto was happy for Akaashi. I mean he was getting better, but dating again. Dating meant more girlfriends. Dating meant less time with Bokuto and more with his girlfriend. Dating meant kissing, cuddling, and having sex with people that were not bokuto. Dating meant Akaashi would fall in love for someone that wasn’t Bokuto. 

“Bokuto?” Akaashi questioned. Of course he could already tell something was wrong. Bokuto put on the best smile he could and stood up. 

“That’s great Akaashi!” Bokuto said and Akaashi quirked a brow. “I actually have a early class so I actually have to go so can you lock up when you leave thanks!” 

“But you didn’t finish your food.” Akashi said but by the time he started talking Bokuto was already out the door. 

* * *

  
  


Bokuto had been driving for a good thirty minutes now. He didn’t know where to go. Of course he didn’t have an early class but he had to get out of that situation. One more second hearing Akaashi talk about dating and he would have busted out crying in front of Akaashi. 

He felt horrible for leaving Akaashi like that. Akaashi was just talking to him about all the progress he was making and he just left him in a rush. And Akaashi knew he didn’t have an early class. They had the same first class today. God Bokuto was such an idiot. In an hour he would have to talk to Akaashi and make some type of excuse. 

* * *

Bokuto had gotten to class earlier then normal that day. And of course Akaashi was already there waiting in the seats they sit in normally. Bokuto took a deep breath and walked over to his seat. 

“So you want to tell me what all that was about this morning?” Akaashi asked as Bokuto sat down. 

“Oh uh you see I asked a girl out last week and she rejected me. So now I was just reminded that I am single when you started talking about dating.” Bokuto said chuckling. 

“Oh.” Akaashi said and looked down at the table. He looked said. Bokuto was confused. Why Akaashi be sad in Bokuto was single. 

“It’s not a big deal, you can talk about dating all you want, I just sort of freaked for a second today.” Bokuto said with a smile. He was hoping Akaashi wouldn’t see through his lie. Akaashi didn’t even look up. 

“Okay.” Was all Akaashi said and he then took his stuff out of his backpack. Class started soon after that and Bokuto and Akaashi didn’t hang out after school that day. 

* * *

  
  


After that Bokuto and Akaashi hung out less. Still more then when he was with Cait but this time Bokuto had declined hanging out with Akaashi sometimes. It was just too much for Bokuto. 

“Hey man.” Kuroo had said. It was the middle of the afternoon on a saturday. Bokuto and Akaashi had been watching some shows. It has still been awkward since the day Bokuto freaked out. Kuroo had called Bokuto suddenly. 

“What’s up?” Bokuto asked over the phone. Akaashi looked over to Bokuto his facial expressions confused. Kuroo Bokuto mouthed out the word so Akaashi would understand who he was talking to. Realization came across Akaashi’s face and he looked back to the tv. 

“Hey guess what.” Kuroo said. 

“What.” Bokuto said, he never actually guessed what Kuroo wanted to tell him. 

“Shorty is getting married.” Kuroo said. Bokuto jumped up. 

“What!” He yelled. Akashi looked over at him. 

“What is going on?” Akaashi asked quietly. 

“Hinata is getting married!” Bokuto said. Akaashi eyebrows shoot up and eyes widen. 

“Oh” was all Akaashi said. 

“Him and Kageyama finally made it official?” Bokuto asked. 

“Yup, and it’s in a week, of course all of us are invited.” Kuroo said nonchalantly. 

“A week!” Bokuto yelped “They are crazy” 

“Apparently they had been planning for a year but never actually said anything.” Kuroo said. 

“Those sneaky bastards.” Bokuto said.    
“I’ll send you all the information. Maybe this can be you and Akaashi’s first date.” Kuroo said. Bokuto could hear the smirk through his voice. 

“Haha, whatever I guess we will see you there.” Bokuto said and hung up before hearing any more from Kuroo. 

“So the wedding is in a week?” Akaashi asked. 

“Yup and we are both going. Kuroo sent me all the information so I will send it to you. Do you have a suit?” Bokuto asked. 

“Yes I do.” Akaashi said. “I can meet you here before and we can go together.” Akaashi said and turned back to the tv. Bokuto cheeks burned bright red, luckily Akaashi wasn’t looking at him. 

“Great!” Bokuto said. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


Bokuto opened the door and saw in all his glory Akaashi in a suit. Dear lord help him now. The suit fit him perfectly. It hugged all the right places. His waist looked so much small then it normally did because of the tapered suit. Prefect size for Bokuto though. And then Bokuto’s eyes traveled up to Akaashi’s face and god he was beautiful. Bokuto couldn’t look away. His eyes just seemed to draw Bokuto in and wouldn’t let good. 

“You look good.” Bokuto said as his voice cracked. He cringed. Akaashi smiled. 

“So do you Bokuto-san.” Akaashi said. God he loved this man so much. 

“Ready to go?” Bokuto asked and Akaashi nodded. They made their way to the car. 

* * *

  
  


The wedding was pretty small. Bokuto wasn’t expecting anything really big because he knew Kageyama and Hinata. They just wanted the people important to them to be there. But the venue was beautiful. Not as beautiful as Akaashi but still beautiful. The whole wedding was beautiful. Bokuto cried of course but Akaashi brought tissues because he knew Bokuto would need them. They had gotten back to Bokuto’s apartment a little after 11. 

“Man that was beautiful.” Bokuto said as has and Akaashi walked through the door. 

“Yeah it really was, it’s nice they have each other.” Akaashi said and they sat on the couch. 

“Do you want to just stay here tonight it’s already pretty late.” Bokuto asked. Akaashi nodded. 

“I clean your pjs the other day when I did laundry they are in the bathroom, if you want to change.” Bokuto said. Akaashi quietly walked to the bathroom and shut the door. Bokuto changed quickly and by the time he was finished, so was Akaashi. He was walking out of the bathroom and sat on the end of the couch. He always curled in on himself whenever he sat on couches. It was the cutest thing Bokuto has ever seen. It was like he was trying to become smaller and smaller then he already was. 

“What do you want to watch.” Bokuto asked as he sat next to Akaashi. He sat closer then he normally would have but he just wanted to be near Akaashi in the moment.    
“I don’t really care, I will fall asleep soon.” Akaashi said and Bokuto laughed lightly. He turned on the tv and Akaashi leaned his head on Bokuto’s shoulder. Bokuto’s breath caught in his throat. Akaashi would normally only be this close and touchy when he was asleep. 

“You know I didn’t even know Hinata and Kageyama were dating at first, I just thought they were really close friends. Kind of like us.” Akaashi said. 

Oh right, just close friends. 

“Yeah uh it was hard to tell at first but they make a cute couple.” Bokuto said. He really didn’t know what to do. It took all his will power to not just confess to Akaashi then. Akaashi lifted his head and looked over to Bokuto. Bokuto turned his head to face him. Their face a mere couple inches apart. 

“I wonder if we would make a cute couple.” Akaashi said and his eyes flicked down to Bokuto’s lips. Bokuto felt like he couldn’t breath. What was Akaashi saying. Why would he say this.

“Don’t do that.” He whispered. 

“Don’t do what?” Akaashi asked. They were close enough for Bokuto to feel Akaashi’s breath. This really couldn’t be good for his health. 

“Don’t give me hope.” Bokuto said. It was probably the quietest thing Bokuto had ever said in his life. I couldn’t believe what was happening. Why was Akaashi messing with his feelings like this. He knew there was no way Akaashi felt the same there was just no way. 

“Hope?” Akaashi said his face confused “Bokuto-san do you like me too.” 

Bokuto felt his stomach twist. Like him? Did Akaashi just asked if he liked him too.? Does that mean. Wait.    
“Akaashi you like me?” Bokut asked quietly, they were still so close just staring at each other now. Akaashi nodded slowly. Bokuto eyes grew. Akaashi liked him back? Akaashin liked him back! Oh god it was the best feeling in the world. This was impossible, Akaashi actually liked him back. His best friend Akaashi, he didn’t deserve this. After a couple seconds of Bokuto not saying anything Akaashi backed away. 

“I think I misunderstood something.” Akaashi said quietly and was about to get up when Bokuto grabbed his arms pulling him back down and pressing his lips to Akaashi’s. Bokuto pulled Akaashi’s waist closer and after a couple of seconds Akaashi was kissing him back. 

It was amazing. It was Akaashi, Akasshi like Bokuto has never felt and he wanted more. They pulled back a couple seconds later. Just far enough to look at each other but still close enough to feel each other’s breath. 

“Do you really like me?” Bokuto asked. Akaashi nodded. Bokuto smiled probably the biggest he has ever smiled. 

“I like you too Akaashi.” Bokuto whispered. 

“Good.” Akaashi said with a smile. 

“Great.” Bokuto said with an even bigger smile and quickly pulled Akaashi in kissing him more. 


End file.
